March phraseology; Ins and Outs

March is the greatest month of the year; the time-tested "Da na na, da na nah" plucks the shit out of my heartstrings. But that doesn't mean the rest of the vernacular couldn't use some refurbishing, so here's a few of Mr. Red's thoughts on what should be IN and OUT when it comes to professional or amateur punditry...

OUT: "When they're playing well, they can beat anybody in the country".

Yes, when X team is hitting shots, playing great defense, creating turnovers, and taking care of the basketball, yes, I agree, X team can beat any team in the country.

The problem is there's about 40 teams in the country that fit that bill, so please, save your breath.

IN: Being "doody". I did my undergrad at Murray State, so I was in close contact with others that had colloquialisms that I had never heard of, or had once heard of but long since forgotten. Being "doody" is a nice cutdown that was popular once upon a time, and I think it's time for it to be resurrected.

As in: "UK got a nice win at Tennessee yesterday, but I still think UT is doody".

OUT: Charlie Sheen-isms. Please, please please, I know he's topical and I've had my share of laughs over his sideshow, but please, each March Madness deserves a timeless quality to it. I'd hate to see Morehead State knock off a #2 seed only to have it ruined for posterity when some jokester says: "Faried's got "TIGER BLOOD! (da na nah, da na nah)"

IN: "If you put a gun to my head". Some may not like the firearm reference, but I despise the vague predictions of the college pundits. They get paid salaries to do what the rest of us do for free (save for the Google Ads that have made us stinkin' rich). The least they can do is make their thoughts plain. If you think Villanova stinks, sac up and state it, no hedging. In fact, "sac pick" may lead next year's list of terms for a guaranteed Elite Eight pick for a squad seeded #4 or higher.

OUT: Dark horse. Parity in college basketball has rendered this phrase moot. I'm pre-cringing for the inevitable naming of UNC as everyone's "dark horse" in whatever bracket they wind up in.

Channeling my inner-Obama, "Let me be clear", I'm not against the term as much as the vagueness. If and when one uses said term he or she needs to follow it with: "I like X team as my dark horse to go to X round..."

Until this rule is adopted, yea, I got the Tarheels as my "dark horse" too.

IN: Red horse. Every cliche deserves a counterpart. So I think Red Horse, referencing "red-headed stepchild" should be for the team that is obviously overseeded and will be a cakewalk for the first quality opponent they meet. This year's inaugural Red Horse? You win BYU! On my honor.

OUT: "Deep run in the tournament". Deep run my shorts, Clark Kellogg.

IN: "Rick Pitino! And are you a bit surprised, Clark? And the Louisville Cardinals march on to the Final Four!"